I almost didn't go. FireGirl has not been doing well in their child care, at all. If we put her in there, we usually get paged after about 10-15 min to come get her because she's in hysterics. So the past few weeks we actually haven't gone to the gym unless we have someone to watch her.
But I really want to get back into the swing of going more frequently. FireMan is working, but I wanted to give it a shot.
I dropped her off in child care, and she was crying, but not screaming, so... I left.
I intentionally kept my workout short. Ten minutes on the stationary bike, followed by one lap around the track, and fifteen reps on the shoulder press machine.
I went to pick up FireGirl... and... she was playing happily! I couldn't believe it!
I'm hopeful that this is a sign of a turn-around in this area.
And... according to their scale I've lost two more pounds! I really couldn't believe it. I actually didn't go to my Weight Watchers weigh-in this week because I have done so horribly this past week. Aunt Flo was in town, and I was a little stressed. Last Monday I consumed more chocolate in one day than I probably usually do in two weeks. Plus my back was really bothering me so we skipped our trainer session and I've taken it easy most of the week.
And I still lost two pounds!
I'm becoming more & more convinced that a lot of my weight gain & difficulty losing weight really has been due, at least in part, to my being on Lexapro. And I'm still on it, just not nearly as high a dose as I was before.
In a way it frustrates me, because I feel like I was helpless to change my weight, and because my weight gain has caused me so much stress, and here it might not even really be my fault.
But in another way it relieves me, because it means that I really didn't eat myself into oblivion. I mean, I definitely can improve my eating & activity, but who can't, right? It kinda lifts a weight off of my shoulders (pardon the pun) and give me comfort that once my PPD is under control, and I get off the meds completely, that my weight actually might come off, at least most of it. Maybe.
I guess what I'm really trying to say is that I had reached a point where I was really frustrated with my weight and I felt like it didn't matter what I did I was just always gonna be fat, so why not eat whatever, but now I feel hopeful that now that I'm weaning off the meds I'm starting to see results and maybe it's not a hopeless situation afterall. Maybe I'll reach my pre-baby weight eventually.
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