It's not about a magic number

I've decided I've been worrying way too much about my weight lately.

Don't get me wrong, I know I have weight to lose, I'd like to lose a few pounds.

But I need to stop focusing on the number on the scale.

We're trying to get pregnant, there will be another life depending on me. I need to shift my focus.

I'm still watching my portions, but I've begun putting greater focus on what I'm eating. More fruits & veggies. More salads & nuts. Lean meats. Fruits. Veggies.

Did I mention fruits & veggies?

In case you weren't aware, I'm ont a big fruits & veggies eater. Or at least, I wasn't.

I am not. More than how much I eat, I need to make sure I am eating things that are good for me.

I still watch my portions, but am not as concerned anymore. The meds my endo put me on some two years ago, well, I see the positive effects it has made on my body. Like how now I can go to a restaurant and order a half-order salad and leave feeling full, whereas before a meal like that would have left me wanting more.

And as far as weight goes, well, I know the last time we were trying I gained 14 lbs the first six weeks off of birth control, due to hormonal changes. So I can't be surprised that this time, despite watching my eating & getting regular exercise, I've already gained nine lbs in five weeks.

I need to stop beating myself up about stuff like this, and just focus on being healthy. It's not just about me anymore. It's not about wanting to see a certain number on a scale, or being able to fit into a certain article of clothing. It's about preparing my body to carry my child.

And if hormonal changes or bloat or whatever leave me a few pounds heavier, half a size bigger, then so be it. As long as I know I am making positive changes to be healthier, then I need to be okay with that.

So that's where I am right now. As always, thanks for checking in.