Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Roller Coaster

I saw TheBoy.

And I feel awful.

About my last post.

This is such a roller coaster.

I saw him react to my sister kissing his forehead.

And I don't know how to explain it, but it just seemed like he was "awake" while we were in there, like he was aware of us, and listening to us.

I know that sounds crazy. I know it does. He's in a coma, how can he be "awake"?

Lord - I am so sorry if I showed a lack of faith in any way.

Boy - I am so sorry if I gave up on you too soon.

I am not giving up. On TheBoy or God.

And I am so, so sorry.

I considered deleting my last post. That's how much I regret it. But then I figure, someone out there may have gone / will go through something similar. And I want them to know that it happens. This roller coaster happens.

2 comments:

'Yellow Rose' Jasmine said...

No worries. You have reminded me of how God is perfect and we are not. That is a very valuable lesson and I'm glad you shared it. Sometimes our sensibilities and intuition are off, but God is always right on.

Mindee@ourfrontdoor said...

Ugh. It's beyond roller coaster. I don't think you showed a lack of faith. You made judgements based on doctor reports and your own observations. There's no way to know for sure.

Thanks for your comment on my blog yesterday and giving me the chance to pray for you and your family.

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