Friday, December 10, 2010

A few updates

My dad is doing well, I suppose. He had his follow-up with the surgeon yesterday, who said he looked really good and seemed to be doing really well, but dad hasn't been feeling well at all.

He's been sick to his stomach, hasn't been able to keep much food down, and when he does feel like eating, has horrible acid reflux. He finally got some meds to help with the acid reflux, but he still doesn't feel well, has no energy, etc.

I know some of that is to be expected, but I just worry that if he doesn't eat he won't have the strength his body needs to heal. In fact, he's supposed to weigh himself every day. If he gains too much in one day, he has to call the surgeon for concerns about fluid retention. If he loses too much in one week (I think), he has to call the surgeon. The words "feeding tube" have been heard. I don't like it.

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We toured a daycare yesterday. It was really nice. I guess. I mean, the facility is awesome. The setup is awesome. And starting at age three it doubles as a Montessori preschool. They have two activity areas, great classrooms, good teacher/student ratios, the best security system I've ever seen on a daycare, plus they have weekly music, dance, and art "classes" for all age groups. And with the discount I get with my new permanent employee status, it's a decent price - if you go at least three days per week.

So what's the problem? I'm not sure I'm comfortable with FireGirl being in that type of setting for that length of time at this young of age.

I just can't see sending a two year old to a school-type setting for longer than you average 17-year-old spends in school during the week. Nine hours a day? Really?

I mean, she's two. Still a baby, really.

I know, I know. People do it all the time, right? I mean, this daycare has three different infant rooms they have so many little babies. So obviously it works for a lot of families.

But... I'm not feeling comfortable about it. Not at all.

I just don't know what to do.

We have a couple of friends who might be options for watching FireGirl in their home, but that has its pro's and cons as well.

So, basically, I don't know what to do at this point.

And it's tearing me apart.

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As for my (sorta) new job, if you ignore the incredible amount of working mom's guilt I feel right now, and the enormous amount of stress I'm under trying to juggle our sudden daycare dilemma that started the 2nd day of my job, plus the guilt I feel that this is at all affecting my co-workers, but that I just can't help it, because... well, I just can't, then... it's going really well.

I sat down with my boss yesterday and he went over some of my new responsibilities and I actually got excited about my job for the first time in a long time. Like... years. So, I guess that's cool.

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Tonight is the Christmas Party at the firehouse. FireMan also happens to be on shift, so after work today I'll be picking FireGirl up from the sitter's, then driving the hour to the firehouse, doing the party, then the hour drive back. I'm excited for the party, but not for the drive, or the late night.

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Tomorrow is a wedding for one of FireMan's co-workers. The only female firefighter at his station. And we're going. And of course, it's an adult-only reception, and it's an hour west of our home. Oh, and it's the same night as my family Christmas party. But she's the only one of FireMan's co-workers that came to our wedding, so we're definitely going. And as I'm typing this I suddenly realize that we didn't get her anything yet and I have no idea where she's registered, if anywhere.
Our sitters for tomorrow? My brother, who lives an hour east of our home. So, the wedding's at 4pm, we're dropping FireGirl off at my brother's by 1pm, wedding, formal reception doesn't start until 8pm (I know, right?), gotta stay... what? 10pm minimum, then an hour drive back home. Home by 11pm at the absolute earliest, but like that's really gonna happen. Picking up FireGirl after church on Sunday.

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Because, you know, what's the big deal in not seeing your daughter most of Saturday and half of Sunday just because you already spent Mon-Fri gone at work all week? Right? And you're gonna leave Monday morning to do it all again. No biggie, right? Who cares if  your sitter / daycare worker sees your child almost twice as many waking hours as you do? I mean, those waking hours during your child's most formative years surely can't be that important. Can they? 

3 comments:

Jene said...

I'm not interested in having a debate on the evils of daycare, but for what it's worth, Charlie's daycare is also a school-like setting, with montessori at age 3. Their "curriculum hours" aren't all day long, just in the morning. Then they have lunch, then they take naps, then they sing songs and dance and read stories and paint, and they they have their time in the muscle room or on the playground, depending on the weather.

All in all, Charlie is a happy, well-adjusted toddler, who is always excited to go to school to "go see friends!" and always smiling and happy when I pick him up. It's not the end of the world, and if you're lucky and find a phenomenal center staffed with teachers who are passionate about their jobs and loving toward the children they work with, then I'm sure Firegirl would be, too.

Fire Wife said...

Yeah, I didn't say anything about "evils of daycare". I said it's something that I, personally, am not comfortable with right now.

If a daycare center is working for your family, then awesome.

Marianne said...

I agree with you Fire Wife, if you have options besides a daycare, take them. My kids went to a sitter(hubby's exwife lol) everyday and they loved it and so did I. If you go that route, make sure it's someone who won't just keep your kids entertained with a TV all day. Our sitter took them on trips to the library, etc. They also were exposed to less illness at a sitter. We were so fortunate to have someone who cared so much for our kids!

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